When in 2018 I decided to pursue my humble dream of getting qualified as a professional coach little did I know what a whirlwind of change this will bring into my life.
My journey was truly transformational. And I don’t mean the external factors, such as building a new network of coaches, gaining new skills, and uncovering new opportunities. The biggest transformation happened inside of me - with my mindset. By bringing my fears to the surface and finding the courage to overcome them, I found who I truly am at the core of my being and that has helped me immensely in building my coaching practice.
I cannot stress enough the importance of doing the inner ‘root’ work. Though this is the work that no one sees on the surface, at least not initially, this work will make you thrive in time and will pay off when you are stepping into the unknown, it will keep you going in the moments of self-doubt when you struggle with adversities of external circumstances.
Often we don’t give ourselves time to reflect and do inner work. We rush through life with a fixed mindset and think: that’s who we are. But beneath there are many layers of us that just keep unfolding as we continue to learn about ourselves and become more self-aware.
At the start of my coaching journey entrepreneurship was out of my reach. A lucid dream which was so so far from my reality. The reason why I enrolled for a coaching qualification, was not to become a coach, I wanted to raise up my skills and be able to offer more value in my job.
Now the amazing thing is that when I started to work on my roots I uncovered just how many obstacles were residing in me, not outside.
One powerful experience was when I learned to recognise my inner team: the voices residing in me or the inner dialogue of the critics and the cheerleaders going in the background of my mind.
And the critics were so loud!
‘You are not good enough!’
“Things are hard!’
‘Things take you too long!’
‘One step forward, two backward - what’s the point?’
‘Get real, others are ahead and they are better than you!’
That’s not the motivation I want to listen to, and these are meant to be my closest advisors!? I wonder if I can quiet them down…?
Over time of practising the work with my inner team, I learned to consciously choose which voices I want to listen to, as well as to get to know and understand myself, appreciate myself the way I was and embrace the change as part of my journey.
The resistance which used to reside in me always caused me some form of emotional harm, for example getting frustrated when things did not go to plan. By becoming more self-aware I was able to recognise it and adapt to the current of life rather than go against it.
These amongst other coaching tools helped me to explore the many aspects of myself, reflect on important influences in my life, firstly by becoming aware of them and then making more conscious choices about what I actually want to believe about myself.
From that place, the clarity comes much easier.
“Whether you think you can, or you think you can't--you're right.” A famous quote by Henry Ford started to resonate more than ever.
In closing, I would like to invite you to explore and reflect on your inner team.
Here is how you can start:
Think of yourself in a particular context – where you would like to improve your performance or stop a destructive behaviour
Think about a stage/head office/control room/boardroom within you Who is in your “cast of characters” or on your “board of directors”?
Who is in charge?
Who else is there?
What are their roles?
Who is holding back your progress?
What is their intention?
Who needs to stay, go or be given a new role?
Check with all characters that any changes will be ok
Repeat this exercise as many times as you need and remember it doesn’t matter where you are on the journey of self-discovery, what matters is that you keep moving towards it!
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